The Harris Company Commercial Real Estate Appraiser / Consultant, Los Angeles, California, MAI, Curtis D. Harris
The Harris Company,
Real Estate Appraiser / Consultant
5780 West Centinela Avenue, Building 1, Suite 408
Los Angeles, California 90045
310.337.1973  harris_curtis@sbcglobal.net
PIRS/ HARRIS COMPANY AND THE SCIENCE OF REAL ESTATE - PARTNERS
Uncle Sam Needs You!
We Make a Simple
Pledge to

Communicate, in a timely
Fashion, each appraisal,
analysis, and opinion
without
bias or partiality

Abstain from behavior
that
is deleterious to our
clients,
the appraisal profession,
and the public

Hold paramount the
confidential nature of the
appraiser/consultant -
client relationship

and

Comply with the
requirements
of the Uniform Standards
of
Professional Appraisal
Practice
and the
Code of
Professional Ethics of
the National Society of
Real Estate Appraisers
MAI Appraiser
" Ain't this place ah' geographical oddity."
The Modern "MAI" Appraiser
HYPOTHETICAL QUESTION
Based on your professional experience, educational background, and Code of Professional Standards,
which preliminary conclusion shown below appears to best satisfy the proverbial question: How much is
two plus two (2 +2=?)
A.  Three or less
B.  Five or more
C.  Approximately 4.0 (3.8-4.2)
D.  Insufficient data, cannot determine until I know who the client is and what the purpose is!


Fred W Holtsberry
In my formative years, the only Art professor I ever respected taught his charges that all great art affect’s
members of its audience in different ways, depending on the context of each member’s experience as well
as their current mood.

I’m not sure why, but this clip (
http://www.video.me/ViewVideo.aspx?vid=9368  ) reminded me of his
constant admonition that “no piece means anything until it has passed through the viewer’s filters”.
===============================
Fred W Holtsberry
Mid-Ohio Appraisal Services


ACTING STUPIIDLY
"The only source of knowledge is experience." Albert Einstein

"Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes." Oscar Wilde

If! Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes. And The only
source of knowledge is experience.  Then mistakes equate to knowledge.

And, If mistakes equate to knowledge, then a lack of mistakes must equate to Stupidity.
Curtis D. Harris


MAI INFECTION (Mycobacterium Avium-Intracellulare, Infection)
Last Updated: February 2, 2006  Rate this Article  
Email to a Colleague  
Get CME/CE for article  
Synonyms and related keywords: Diarrhea of the Mouth; Mycobacterium avium complex, Mycobacterium
avium-intracellulare, MAI, MAC, disseminated Mycobacterium avium-intracellulare, DMAI, cutaneous MAI,
cervical adenitis, cervical lymphadenitis, atypical mycobacterial disease  

What is an MAI Appraiser? (MAI, MAI Los Angeles)
or associate members of the Appraisal Institute. Please read notice Members who hold the MAI, SRPA and
SRA designations have met rigorous ...  Wrong Answer!

Fourteen Job Functions (Duties/Responsibilities) of A MAI Appraiser (Appraisal Institute) LA:
14. Coordinate all commercial/industrial and apartment mai appraisal and assessment work for multiple
taxing districts that contract with Hennepin County for assessment services
13. Serve as a contact person for local officials regarding their commercial/industrial assessment and
appraisal questions or problems.
12. Serve as the resource for taxpayer inquiries and complaints.
11. Supervise all commercial/industrial and apartment appraisal programs.
10. Coordinate the mai appraisal and assessment of apartments, commercial and industrial properties
throughout Hennepin County.
9. Use all appraisal approaches to appraise commercial, industrial and apartment properties.
8. Analyze property transaction information and income and expense statements.
7. Review assessment levels.
6. Gather and analyze information for ratio studies to establish ratio standards
5. Assist local assessment officials with valuation of real property and provide advice on assessment
decisions.
4. Prepare and give expert testimony in Tax Court on market value opinions.
3. Coordinate taxpayer valuation hearings and attend Board of Review meetings.
2. Act as a training resource for other commercial/industrial real estate appraisers.

and,  the number one function and bottom line is:
1. Provide the client with a (
M)ade (A)s (I)nstructed value so that the client can "Do His
Deal!"

<
IF YOU CANNOT SEE THE HUMOR IN THIS YOU SHOULD THINK ABOUT ANOTHER
PROFESSION!
Hello Curtis,
A member of Appraisal Data Connection is searching for market data.
Maurice Mitchell, MAI (Appraiser), is appraising a proposed bio-diesel facility on
40-acres.  He's searching nationwide for comparable sales and rentals of
similar properties, as well as properties that could be easily adapted to
bio-diesel.
If you can help or know someone who can, please email Maurice directly at:
mauricemitchell@bellsouth.net
Or you can phone him at 334-264-2476.  His fax number is 334-263-2183. >

DO YOU THINK THAT THE SACRAMENTO COUNTY FLOOD CONTROL DISTRICT USED
AN
MAI APPRAISER IN THIS/THESE CASE(S)?
Sacramento County Flood Control District v. Cross (January 2005)
Sacramento Superior Court No. 01 AS 06214
Represented property owners in a three-week jury trial concerning compensation for
property taken in the Rio Linda area of Sacramento County, including significant flooding
issues and a value based upon a higher and better use.
SAFCA's appraisal:
$160,000.00
Property Owners' appraisal:
$628,000.00
Jury Verdict:
$400,000.00

Real estate agent spoof -
humor
Spoof. Very funny!! We need one for appraisers.
Sorry, I can’t describe it - you just have to see it...
Thanks to Tawfik Ahdab on appraisersforum.com for this great link.

Wishing That "You Rot in Hell"
BAH HUMBUG FROM PROPERTY RIGHTS ADVOCATE
Associated
Press
Bah, humbug. The woman at the center of the national battle over property rights has some
less-than-joyous tidings for the people involved in using eminent domain to take her house
to make way for private development. However, at least one recipient of Susette Kelo's
unmerry greeting has put it on his mantel with his other cards.
http://news.lp.fin dlaw.com/ap/o/632/12-21-2006/9afd001010251f3d.html
Why is
Kelo a Scrooge?
[To view the full-text of cases you must sign in to FindLaw.com.]
http://c aselaw.lp.findlaw.com/scripts/getcase.pl?court=us&vol=000&invol=04-108

It rolls down
hill

These Charges Stink!
FELONIOUS FLATULENCE LEADS TO CRIMINAL ASSAULT CHARGES FOR JAIL INMATE
Northe Platte Bulletin
It was a case of felonious flatulence in a confined space that led to felony assault charges
against a Lincoln County Jail inmate last week. Brian Bruggeman, 38, Hershey, was charged
with assault on a confined person after he allegedly passed gas repeatedly on his cellmate,
which resulted in a fight.
http://rd.findlaw.com/scripts/nl.pl?url=11672064000_nl
What's A Felony?
http://criminal.findlaw.com/articles/1382.html

Dead Men Tell no Tales or ...: This may be the best new way to protect your estate, will
someone inform O.J.
Ex-Enron CEO's Conviction Tossed, Restitution To Lays' Crime Victims Denied
U.S. V. KENNETH L. LAY
October 17, 2006
A federal judge in Houston set aside the criminal conviction of deceased former Enron CEO Kenneth Lay,
and denied requests to have Lay’s estate pay restitution to victims of his crimes, citing the fact that he died
"before sentencing, before a final judgment could be entered, and before a notice of appeal could be filed."

Ladies, How to find a
stud!

Creative appraisal definitions
"MAI - Missing All Intellect, Mad And Ignorant
*MLS - Multiple Lip Service
*AACI - Appraised According to Counsel's Instruction.
*FSBO - Foolish Seller/Bad Occupation
*Band of Investments - A group of financial officers who hold jam sessions in the back room of the NYSE.
*Capitalization Rate - The number which is arrived at by dividing the number the client wants by the net
operating income.     
*Eminent Domain - From the Latin. Eminent, meaning big, or prominent. Domain, meaning where one
lives. Hence, a big house.
*Fair Market Value - The value of items sold at a country fair.
*Highest and Best Use - Whatever the person who is paying for the appraisal wants to do with the property.
*Internal Rate of Return - An often used but seldom understood term of questionable meaning and
doubtful significance. Also, the inverse of External Rate of Return.
*Marginal Utility - Many appraisals.
*Market Value - Formerly, one sentence which covered the bases pretty well. Now, a page of explanation,
some of which appears to be contradictory and imprecise.
*Depth Tables - Charts used by SCUBA divers and fishermen.
*Purpose of the Appraisal - To make a living in the appraisal business.
*Functional Obsolescence - That state of many older appraisers.
*The Subject - A term police use to identify the victim of a crime.
*Subject Property - A term police use to identify the belongings of a victim of a crime.    
*Jury - Twelve people who determine which client has the better lawyer.
*Trapezoid - A device for catching zoids.

Prosecutors Try To Seize Gold Dental Work Of Defendants

"" Court sides with church in dispute over hallucinogenic tea drinking By GINA HOLLAND Associated Press
Writer (AP) - WASHINGTON-The U.S. Supreme Court ruled unanimously Tuesday that a small
congregation may use hallucinogenic tea as part of a four-hour ritual intended to connect with God.

"" Congress, Rep. Patrick Kennedy's (Dem. - R.I.) early morning traffic accident report on Capitol Hill
involving his 1997 Mustang. In a statement to the press, Kennedy said that he "do[es] not remember
getting out of bed, being pulled over by the police, or being cited for three driving infractions." According to
the police officer's report, Kennedy explained that
he was “headed to the Capitol to make a vote.’ Kennedy
will reportedly seek professional help for an addiction to pain medication, citing concern over his “reaction
to the medication.”

Those Alpha Delta Animals
POLICE RAID 'ANIMAL HOUSE' FRATERNITY
Associated Press
Authorities raided the Dartmouth College fraternity that inspired the 1978 movie "National Lampoon's
Animal House." Court documents regarding search were sealed, and authorities said only that the Alpha
Delta house raid Thursday was part of a two-year investigation.

Another One For The 'Naughty' List!
NAKED MAN STUCK IN CHIMNEY ARRESTED
San Francisco Chronicle Locked out of his stepmother's home, a 23-year-old man tried to slide down the
chimney like Saint Nick, except without any presents -- or clothes. Or success, according to police officers
who weren't in a festive mood after they spent an hour pushing the naked man back up before dawn
Saturday.

"The Good Old Days"
Old Mobeetie Texas Association DEPARTMENT OF THE INTERIOR, General Land Office
Mobeetie, Texas,
May 19, 1904.

Oops!
MISVALUED HOUSE CAUSES IND. BUDGET WOES
Associated Press A house erroneously valued at $400 million is being blamed for budget shortfalls and
possible layoffs in municipalities and school districts in northwest Indiana.

Time to Hone Those  Instincts
U.S. JURY CONVICTS MAN WHO WOUNDED FELLOW HUNTER HE MISTOOK FOR TURKEY
Associated Press  A jury convicted a turkey hunter of wounding another hunter whom he mistook for a
turkey last May.

Is For Busted
HOLLYWOOD IMPERSONATORS BUSTED FOR ALLEGEDLY HARASSING TOURISTS
Associated Press
Elmo, the red and cuddly Muppet from the Sesame Street television series, has learned a new lesson: 'H'
is for handcuffs.

RONALD MACDONALD CHARGED WITH STEALING FROM A WENDY'S

! LANDLORD SUES RESTAURATEURS OVER GHOSTS
The landlords of an Orlando entertainment complex are suing two restaurateurs for refusing to move into a
renovating building because they claim it is haunted. Subcontractors who worked there and other people
have reported seeing ghosts or other apparitions, said Lynn Franklin, attorney for the restaurant owners.

DIRECTV, INC. V. O.J. SIMPSON July 25, 2005
A federal judge orders O.J. Simpson to pay DirecTV $25,000 plus interest, attorneys fees, and costs, for
using illegal piracy devices to intercept and decrypt DirecTV television satellite programming without paying
for it.
http://news.findlaw.com/hdocs/docs/simpson/dtvoj72505ord.pdf
The original complaint
http://rd.findlaw.com/scripts/nl.pl?url=11224476000_nl
DirecTV's Lawyers
http://pview.findlaw.com/view/2240135_1
O.J. Simpson's Lawyer
http://pview.findlaw.com/view/2824393_1

Limiting conditions and assumptions (humor)
*The person or persons writing this assumes that they have no idea who they are, why they wrote it and
what it means.
*The person or persons writing this is only liable for the amount of their fee for writing this.
*The person or persons writing this has no idea about anything structural and, further, can’t even make
sawdust.
*The person or persons writing this assumes no responsibility for anything environmental and, in fact, the
person writing this has never driven a car.
*The person or persons writing this assumes no responsibility for anything legal in character, and swears
that they never inhaled, or does the writer render any opinion as to title, which is assumed to be
marketable. All existing liens, encumbrances, assessments and any other money owed by the writer have
been disregarded, and the text is written as though free and clear, even though the writer knows better.
Unless you told the writer, it is assumed that there is nothing wrong with this writing, or whether the writing
encroaches on any other writings.
*Any exhibits used by the writer are included to assist the reader in visualizing the idea of what is written,
but the writer is not an artist and assumes no responsibility in connection with such artsy craftsy stuff.
*The writer may not be required to give testimony or to appear in court by reason of this writing, or at least
until the writer is released from jail.
*The writer has no present or contemplated future interest in this writing, unless it means the writer can
make money.
*The writer assumes that all the information written in this writing is from reliable sources, and it is
assumed that the information is information and not misinformation.

Project Gutenberg is the first and largest single collection of
free electronic books, or eBooks. Michael Hart,
founder of Project Gutenberg, invented eBooks in 1971 and continues to inspire the creation of eBooks and
related technologies today.

At Archive.org you can find
thöusands of works that are currently in the public domain. Want to put some
cartoons on your web site? Take a look at the "Film Chest Vintage Cartoons", which is full of classic
animated cartoons from the 1930's and 1940's. The collection includes Popeye, Porky Pig, Bugs Bunny,
Woody Woodpecker, The Three Stooges and Betty Boop. They also provide tons of other reproducable
content

Cop Whopper
BURGER KING SUED OVER MARIJUANA IN POLICE OFFICERS' BURGERS
Associated Press
Two police officers have sued Burger King Corp., alleging personal injury, negligence, battery and violation
of fair practices after they were served hamburgers that had been sprinkled with marijuana. "It gives a
whole new meaning to the word 'Whopper,'" plaintiffs attorney Sam Bregman said Monday.  
P.S.  What else could he tell his commanding officer after he got busted for being high on the job?
MAI Appraisal, MAI
Appraiser, Inspector,
Inspections,
Commercial Real
Estate Inspectors,
Commercial Property
Inspectors

Appraiser
appraisal

Real Estate Appraiser,
Commercial Real Estate
Appraiser, Residential
Appraiser, Apartment Appraiser,
CommercialAppraisal,

California
Appraiser,
PMI Removal
Appraiser,
Free Appraisal.  
Certified General
Appraiser
Tax Appraiser
"Open Mouth Insert Foot"

Ross Acheson-Acheson
Appraisal Services
&
FHA/FNMA Instructor
"... that's ridiculous (see
below) in a condominium you
cannot purchase the air
space because overnight the
air will leave and the next day
you will have nothing left!"

(WHAT IS A CONDOMINIUM?
Legally, a condo is a "vertical
subdivision," which includes
ownership of airspace to the
inner walls, ceiling and floor
surfaces of a residence unit.
The building structure and
the land are common areas
owned by the homeowner's
association, to which all
condo owners in the complex
automatically belong.)








Curtis D. Harris,
President
Appraisal, Appraiser,
Inspector, Inspections,
Commercial Real
Estate Inspectors,
Commercial Property
Inspectors

Appraiser
appraisal

Real Estate Appraiser,
Commercial Real Estate
Appraiser, Residential
Appraiser, Apartment Appraiser,
CommercialAppraisal,

California
Appraiser,
PMI Removal
Appraiser,
Free Appraisal.  
Certified General
Appraiser
Tax
Appraiser
MAI Appraisal, MAI
Appraiser, Inspector,
Inspections,
Commercial Real
Estate Inspectors,
Commercial Property
Inspectors

Appraiser
appraisal

Real Estate Appraiser,
Commercial Real Estate
Appraiser, Residential
Appraiser, Apartment Appraiser,
CommercialAppraisal,

California
Appraiser,
PMI Removal
Appraiser,
Free Appraisal.  
Certified General
Appraiser
Tax
Appraiser
Appraisal, Appraiser,
Inspector, Inspections,
Commercial Real
Estate Inspectors,
Commercial Property
Inspectors

Appraiser
appraisal

Real Estate Appraiser,
Commercial Real Estate
Appraiser, Residential
Appraiser, Apartment Appraiser,
CommercialAppraisal,

California
Appraiser,
PMI Removal
Appraiser,
Free Appraisal.  
Certified General
Appraiser
Tax
Appraiser
Just for Fun
WELCOME TO THE HARRIS COMPANY, REAL ESTATE
APPRAISERS/CONSULTANTS
John Ross, CEO
Appraisal Institute
(MAI)  " . . the mark of
any profession is in
the development of
new theory, and in my
estimation
there have
been few, if any,
advances in this
regard in the
appraisal profession
for the last 25 years
or more
." circa 2006
MAI Appariser
EXCUSE ME! MR. PRESIDENT?
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You can find great local Los Angeles, CA real estate information on Localism.com Curtis Harris, BS, CGREA, REB is a proud member of the ActiveRain Real Estate Network, a free online community to help real estate professionals grow their business.
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